Marriage, Divorce & Sex - 01

Date 26.02.2023

People of God GREETINGS!

It is another week and we thank and rejoice in the Living God, our Heavenly Father, through the Lord Jesus Christ, for His provision, love, care, and his indwelling peace in us by the Divine Person of the Holy Spirit.

Main Bible Scripture:

Mark 10 v 7-9

Other Associated Scriptures: Genesis 1 v 27, Genesis 5 v 2, 1 Corinthians 7 v 1-16, Mark 10 v 2-12, Matthew 22 v 29-30, Hebrews 13 v 4, Galatians 15 v 50, 1 Corinthians 15 v 50, Ephesians 5 v 22 – 33, 1Peter 3 v 1-7, Revelation 19 v 6-9 and so on.

Prayer:

Heavenly Father, in the Name of our Lord Jesus Christ, we thank you for another week of divine health, divine peace, divine provision and divine wisdom and revelation of God, the Father of spirits. We come today, this very hour, in our own accord, to feed our born-again spirit-beings with the rich nutrient of God’s Holy Word. We agree that your Word is the truth. We trust the Holy Spirit to bring the light of God’s Word into our minds and the direction of that Word into our spirits. We trust you, the Lord Jesus Christ, that we will be doers of your Word and not hearers, readers or speakers only.  In Jesus Name. Amen

Theme/Subject: Marriage, Divorce & Sex

Our theme or subject is “Marriage, Divorce & Sex.” This is series 01. 

There are two main marriages that the Holy Written Word of God teaches. And every born-again child of God who is growing in Christ Jesus believes and acts on the teachings of God’s Word whether or not by doing so challenges the popular narratives of the subject in the world. We mature and grow in Christ when the Word of God [Christ] lives in us richly and practice the Word (see Colossians 3 v 16). As born-again children of God in Christ Jesus, we are in the world but we are not of the world. Satan rules the world but he cannot rule us who are in Christ Jesus unless we allow him. This is because those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh (the godless human nature) with its passions and desires (see Galatians 5 v 24, Romans 1 v 7-32).   Jesus said in John 17 v 17 “God’s Word is truth.”

The two marriages God’s Word teaches are: the marriage between the husband and his wife and the marriage between the Lamb [Christ Jesus] and the church or the body of Christ (see Genesis 1 v 27, Mark 10 v 7-9, Revelation 19 v 6-9).

In this teaching series under marriage we will focus primarily on the marriage between the husband and his wife. The Greek word which translates ‘marriage’ is spelt ‘gamos’. The marriage between the husband and his wife is fleshly or carnal or natural (see Mark 10 v 8, Ephesians 5 v 31). The two (the husband and his wife) shall become one flesh. Notice that it did not say the two shall become one spirit but one flesh. The marriage between the Lamb and the church or the body of Christ is heavenly or spiritual (see Revelation 19 v 6-9).

There are three sub categories which come under the marriage between the husband and his wife which are: the marriage between believing husband and his believing wife, the marriage between the believing husband and his unbelieving wife (hybrid marriage) and the marriage between the unbelieving husband and his believing wife (hybrid marriage) – see 1 Corinthians 7 v 10 – 16). As far as I am aware God’s Word does not teach on any other marriage. It is prudent therefore to spend time feeding on the marriage God’s Word teaches and put them into practice whilst at the same time respecting others ‘freewill’ of choice on the subject in order to live a peaceable life. Respecting others freewill of choice does not mean you believe in their choice or support their choice or act on their choice.  Please pause and reflect!

As Christian parents, God’s Word gives us ‘divine responsibility’ to train or teach our children the way they should go and when they grow, they will not depart from those training. Children obey your parents in the Lord Jesus, for this is right (see Ephesians 6 v 1). Not only that Christian parents have divine responsibility for training or teaching their children but God’s Word also provides instructions as to what to teach or train them. “Children obey your parents in the Lord Jesus, for this is right.” Christian parents are responsible to teach their children in the Lord Jesus first and other things they need to know to become responsible citizens of the country in which they live. ‘A well taught Christian child by their parents in the Lord Jesus never grow to become a nuisance in the community but a responsible member and contributor of the community’. When it comes to the subject of marriage, it is the divine responsibility of the Christian parent to train or teach their children the God’s way so that they will not depart from it when they grow. Please Pause and reflect!

God, the Father of spirits never imposes His ‘will’ on anybody and we as His children must never impose our ‘will’ on others. Christian parents have the ‘divine responsibility’ to train their children in the Lord Jesus because it is right according to God’s Word. Christian parents who are exercising this divine responsibility is not imposing their ‘will’ on their children. God’s Word teaches that a child left to himself or herself brings shame to his parents (see Psalm 29 v 15). They need our guidance and direction not only through God’s Word but also in this natural life. The Resurrected Christ, never sent the born-again believers to go to the world to impose their ‘will’ on the world. No! That is not what He sent us to the world to do. Jesus said “Go into all the world and preach or proclaim the gospel to every creature (see Mark 16 v 15).” It is religion and religious individuals that impose and violate others ‘will’. But, true born-again believers proclaim or teach the gospel to others from the Holy Written Word of God as they are led by the Holy Spirit. They lead them to the truth.

The Living God and our heavenly Father is never and has never been religious.  There is nothing religious about the Living God, about the Son and about the Holy Spirit. In other words, He, the Living God has never imposed things on people. For example, according to 1 Timothy 2 v 4 - God desires or wills that all men (all people) be saved and come to the knowledge of the truth. The point I like you to see from this holy Scripture is that although God desires or wills for all people to be saved but He does not impose His desire or will on them but He leads them to the truth concerning salvation and allows them to freely decide or choose whether to believe the truth and practice it or not (see John 3 v 16). We, born-again children of God need to see this side of our Creator and Father and imitate Him always. God respects our freewill and He cannot and will not invade our freewill and neither should you nor I as children of God.

Therefore, concerning our subject on ‘marriage’ as children of God we should maintain believing and supporting God’s stance on marriage always whilst at the same time respecting others freewill. As a born-again child of God and continuing growing in Christ Jesus I teach my children what God’s Word teaches on marriage. It is my divine responsibility as a believing father and husband to do. I do not leave this divine responsibility to Sunday School teachers as important as they are, I do not leave this divine responsibility to church leaders to do as important as they are, I do not leave this divine responsibility for politicians to do as important as they are. God’s Word did not say Sunday School teachers train or teach other Christian children in the Lord Jesus, for this is right. No! It says parents (or guardians) train or teach your children in the Lord Jesus, for this is right. Many Christian parents do not obey this simple instruction from the Lord in their homes and they wonder why their children are going wayward and going contrary to God and His Word. 

God’s Word teaches us to be imitators of God as dear children (see Ephesians 5 v 1). Therefore, we must never impose our ‘will’ on others. When we imitate God we believe His Holy Written Word as truth in our hearts (spirit-beings) and we put the Holy Word into practice. I have said all that to get to this point. That concerning the subject on ‘marriage’ as children of God we should maintain believing and supporting God’s stance on the subject always whilst at the same time respecting others freewill to choose. Pease pause and reflect!

The marriage between the husband and his wife

Let us discuss about the marriage between the husband and his wife as per God’s Word.

Regardless of what your local church view on the subject of marriage is today. Regardless of what your minister’s view on the subject of marriage is today. Regardless of what your local politicians’ view on the subject of marriage is today. Regardless of what your niece or nephew’s view on the subject of marriage is today.  As born-again children of God, believe and act on what God’s Word teaches on the subject of marriage between the husband and his wife. The word of God is believed in a person’s heart or his inner most-being or his spirit (see Romans 10 v 10). The Word of God is not there to have second opinion on it but the Holy Word is there to believe in a person heart because it is the Truth. This is because from the very lips of our Lord Jesus Christ, He confirmed that God’s Word is truth (see John 17 v 17). The truth is believed.  

As already touched upon, there are three sub categories which come under the marriage between the husband and his wife which are: the marriage between believing husband and his believing wife, the marriage between the believing husband and his unbelieving wife (hybrid marriage) and the marriage between the unbelieving husband and his believing wife (hybrid marriage) – see 1 Corinthians 7 v 10 – 16).

It is important to note that the marriage between the husband and his wife is fleshly or carnal. Jesus said when He spoke of this marriage “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh, so then they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has put together, let no man (a pastor, a theologian, church leader, believer, unbeliever, politician) separate (see Mark 10 v 7-9).”

I am not sure about you but I have concluded long ago that it far better and most prudent to believe what Jesus says than to believe on the views or second opinions of natural men concerning the things of God, the Father of spirits.

I like us to pay particular attention on the words, the two shall become one flesh. I like you to notice that the husband and his wife are never one spirit but they are one flesh. What does this mean? Marriage between the husband and his wife has challenges and these challenges are the fleshly nature or the carnal nature they become. The desire of the flesh here does not only mean you have cheated on your wife or your husband but includes selfishness, unforgiving, coercive controlling, not being kind or fair and so on.  If we pay attention to what God’s Word teaches about the flesh or the carnal nature as born-again children of God, then we will be able to avoid the desires or lusts of the flesh in our marriage. The Greek word which translates flesh which Jesus used in Mark 10 v 8 is spelt ‘sarx’ and the same word also translates carnal, carnally minded, human being, human nature. My dear sister, Judith Adjei, who lives in America drew my attention to the fact that at weddings many pastors say ‘the two shall become one’ which is incorrect because God’s Word teaches the two shall become one flesh. The husband and his wife. The one flesh the husband and his wife becomes in marriage is there to warn us and at the same time is there as a reminder of what lies ahead of the marriage should both fail to remain in Christ Jesus and fail to continuing growing in Him together as one in Agape love. Ensuring that both the husband and his wife fully understand and are actively acting on their individual roles and responsibilities in the marriage as per what God’s Word teaches (see Ephesians 5 v 22-31, 1Peter 3 v 1-7). I remember, one day I was complaining to God about all that my wife is doing and not doing. Some people will call that ‘blaming it all on her’ before God. And I heard this still small voice on the inside of me or from my spirit-being saying “Thomas, keep doing what I have asked you to do as a husband and as a father as per what My Word teaches and leave what your wife is doing or not doing to Me.” Effectively, it can be interpreted as “Thomas mind your own business” Keep loving and washing your wife with God’s Word and leave her side of responsibility to Me.” I have since shut up and focus on doing what my responsibilities as a believing husband in Christ Jesus do as per the Word of God. God’s Word teaches me to love my wife as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her. This kind of love involves here is agape love or God kind of love which every born-again child of God receives in Christ from the Holy Spirit (see Romans 5 v 5). I can love my wife just as Christ loved the church because the love of God has been poured out in my heart or spirit already by the Holy Spirit when God gave birth to my spirit in Christ. Agape love keeps no record of wrongs. Agape love is unconditional and it is selfless. Agape love never fails. (see 1 Corinthians 13 v 4-8).

It is not yours to vest, the Holy Spirit taught me whether she keeps her share of her divine responsibility as a born-again wife or not. It is between her and Christ. My divine responsibility in the marriage as a born-again husband is to love her as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her. And to wash her with the Word of God and to present her to myself blameless, spotless, holy and righteous. This divine responsibility must not be left for pastors to do and for counsellors to do. It is divine responsibility for the believing husband to teach his wife God’s Word at home and to love her regardless (see Ephesians 6 v 25-27). Please pause and reflect.

The two shall be come one flesh. According to Galatians 5 v 19-21 the works of the flesh or the carnal nature includes adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outburst of wrath (excessive anger), selfish, ambitions, dissensions, heresies, envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like and those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.

But the good news is that Galatians 5 v 24 says this “Those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.” I like what the Holy Spirit spoke through my brother in Christ Nick Kumi on Saturday 25^th February 2023 during our daily feeding on God’s Word on the subject of Marriage.

He said “It is not how long you have married but it is having the full understanding of your responsibilities as a husband or as a wife and put into practice those responsibilities in the marriage as per God’s Word.”

Remember! The key challenge in the marriage between the husband and his wife is overcoming the one flesh they become and realising that by remaining in Christ and growing in Him, they have already crucified the flesh and go ahead to allow their born-again spirit-beings to produce the fruit of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, self-control and so on in the marriage.  

Closing Prayer

Heavenly Father in Christ Jesus we thank you for your incorruptible living Word, that Word has come to us, help us to be doers thereof. In Jesus Name. Amen. To God be the glory forever and ever in Jesus Name by the power of the Holy Spirit. I know that you are blessed by these teachings, why don’t you share them with others to be blessed also? It is also important to get your feedback and how together, through these teachings we are growing in faith in God’s Holy Written Word.     By: Bro Thomas Boakye